The Worst Week Yet:
August 13-19, 2023

Tatiana Atkins

2,403 words

Chicago Activist Asks Gangs if They Would Be Kind Enough to Please Only Shoot People at Night

According to Chicago Police Department stats, last year yielded 695 homicides and 2,832 shootings in the Windy City. Assuming that not all of the homicides resulted from shootings and that there was at least a sprinkling of fatal stabbings, stranglings, and even punchings, it’s fair to conclude that with a homicide-to-shooting ratio of perhaps one in five or even lower, nearly all of the shootings involved black gunmen.

Lowballing it even further for the sake of equity, I’ll assume that at least 600 of those murder victims were black. That amounts to at least 50 dozen black lives savagely cut down by their co-ethnics. Six hundred black lives that mattered, only to have their blood ruthlessly splattered. Six hundred future basketball players, aspiring rapists, and career Illinois politicians who will never grace the world with their beguiling smiles — which, I’m told, you’re able to see even in the dark.

This past spring, Chicago welcomed a new black mayor, and his first month in office saw a 38% spike in crime compared to the old black mayor.

At least one black woman has stepped forward to say, “This shit be crazy and we dun had enough.” Tatiana Atkins is a co-founder of an activist group called Native Sons. The group is based in the Rogers Park area, which has seen shootings spike “significantly” this year due to a turf war between the Gangster Disciples and the Black P Stones.

Although it is not a legally binding document, Native Sons have drafted what they call “The People’s Ordinance,” a scrap of sacred parchment that quite reasonably asks if the Gangster Disciples and Black P Stones insist on shooting one another that they at least confine their shootings between 9 PM and 9 AM because li’l black children and the black elderly are much less likely to be hit in the crossfire during those times.

According to Atkins:

We have to start somewhere. . . . Our goal is to approach our city’s gun violence problem strategically and not all at once. Things didn’t become this way overnight, and change won’t happen overnight. . . . Under this ordinance, we ask that people stop associating with and glorifying shooters. . . . When those who live a certain lifestyle try to hang with ‘regular’ class citizens, they put everyone at risk. . . . If people know that after a certain hour, the likelihood of them being shot by an unknown and unprovoked assailant are at a higher risk, they will be less likely to be out and about, and they may become more proactive with the supervision of their children. . . . At the end of the day, five-year-olds are being killed by gun violence, 14-year-olds are being killed by gun violence, 78-year-olds are being killed by gun violence, pregnant women are being killed by gun violence, young boys with bright futures are being killed by gun violence, fathers are being killed by gun violence, and this shouldn’t be happening. . . . If you aren’t mentally and emotionally equipped to solve disputes in a healthy manner, if you can’t help but harm each other — do so in a capacity in which children, elderly and those not involved in high-risk activities are less likely to be affected. . . . We live in a trend society, let’s get the right things trending — the more media, government officials, and community residents believe in this ordinance and stand behind it, the more likely the people will align with the ordinance.

We indeed live in a “trend society,” and it’s trending strongly toward stupid.

Typo-Ridden Text Messages Show Florida Mom Encouraged Her Son to Kill the Mother of His Child

Tragically lost amid all the clamor and clanging about black people outperforming other races in murder and rape is the fact that they are also horrible spellers.

Sheila Agee is reportedly only 50 years old, but judging from her recent mug shot, she has “Ageed” badly. Last Monday, the haggard half-breed was arrested and charged with Principal to First-Degree Murder. Her son, an aspiring physicist named Keith Agee, has been charged with First-Degree Premeditated Murder and Aggravated Battery in connection with the August 11 shooting death of 18-year-old Brooklyn Sims, who had the unique fortune of not only being the mother of Keith’s two-year-old daughter but also a contract worker at a Home Depot outlet in Pensacola, Florida.

The Escambia County Sheriff’s Office alleges in a press release that, based on text messages between Mama and Baby Boy, the prematurely elderly Ms. Agee conspired with her son to bump off what I hesitate to call her “daughter-in-law” because there is no evidence that her son and his breeding partner were legally wed:

Investigators discovered that the mother of the suspect, Keith Agee, knew and even helped him coordinate the murder. . . . According to text messages, it’s clear that Keith Agee’s mother, Sheila Agee, knew and participated in the plan to kill Brooklyn Sims. Additionally, text messages between mother and son highlight the mother’s involvement in helping locate the victim.

That’s a clean and concise summary of the situation. Even better, there are no typos.

According to Escambia County Sheriff Chip Simmons — who was confirmed via an image search to be a white man, although I didn’t really need to check because I’ve never heard of a black man named “Chip” and at best have only heard of chocolate chip ice cream — “The murder itself is unbelievable, but to know the mother knew about it and helped coordinate it is incomprehensible.”

Oh, great. Just as I was in the midst of a joyously sobering lecture about black illiteracy, a white lawman comes along pretending there’s a substantive difference between “unbelievable” and “incomprehensible.”

But what’s truly horrifying, and perhaps even worse, than the brazen killing is the stubborn level of ghetto idiocy manifested in the textual exchanges between mother and son. To even begin adding a [sic] to every misspelling here would force the reader to drown in an ocean of [sics]. Compounding my frustration and moral rage is the fact that whoever bowdlerized the first message for popular consumption is that I’ve been up all night trying to figure out what seven-letter dirty word was so offensive that they didn’t even give me a one-letter clue:

Keith: Shi ain’t do nun but cost me money and gave me a ******* I’m fin just shoot her Ik I hate that for [daughter] buh like I said I can’t take it idgaf Nomo.

Sheila: Ok.

Sheila: Ok I’ll call you and tell you mf if you want to go to jail I’ll tell you when we get close but if you don’t come kill her you a mf bitch.

We often hear that black parents aren’t strict enough with their children, so it’s heartwarming to see Sheila admonish her son that if he doesn’t kill the mother of her granddaughter, she’s going to call him a motherfucking bitch.

Displaying the legendary technological savviness for which exiled Africans are famous, mother and son agree to erase their text messages so that the po-po are unable to pin the rap on them:

Sheila: Hold up let me get it erase the texts cause I don’t want nobody to know I was texting you stupid ass.

Keith: I already deleted mine trust me ian gon say shi abt us even tlkin td.

Keith then tells his mama that he will savor the look of desperate regret in his mating partner’s eyes when she realizes that maybe she should have stopped screening his calls. Sheila then tells her son that she doesn’t really give a fuck whether or not he kills his baby mama because she’s at work and her son is starting to annoy her:

Keith: So that last thought of her knowin she fucked and the regret in her face will b enough to satisfy me idgaf what she see wen she dead, Yes tf she do How tf I’m pick her up when yo sorry ass tryna go gamble or hang in Jackson and she don’t pick up the phone, Nah that ain’t even gon fly she a jus die before I let that continue.

Sheila: Ok whatever Idc do what you do idgaf. Cause I’m going home today not to hell or to jail.

Keith: good for u

Sheila: Ok then stop texting me I’m working. Do whatever you want to do. It don’t affect me either fucking way.

All of the white supremacy in the world will never be able to erase the unique bond between a black mother and her child.

Feds: Ohio Woman Named Dermisha Pickett Fabricated “Racist” Text and Voice Messages from Her Landlord

You can buy Jim Goad’s ANSWER Me! here.

As further evidence that the black community sorely needs to get one of its wise, Uncle Remus-style elders to sit them all down at his ashy, smelly, scaly, corn-addled feet and teach them how digital footprints work, now comes news from the great state of Ohio that the US Department of Justice is charging a 33-year-old Cincinnati-based mother of six with fabricating text messages and at least one voicemail from her white landlord in an attempt to frame him as a racist who blatantly traffics in housing discrimination.

The woman’s name is Dermisha Pickett. There is no need for me to tell you that she’s black, because the name “Dermisha Pickett” signals this fact all the way from outer space. She is also described as disabled, but since reports do not specify the disability, I’ll assume that her affliction is being black.

Her landlord, Sergey Briskman, attempted to evict her earlier this year, claiming that she and her brood had caused severe damage to a house they’d been renting since 2014. Briskman reportedly owns over 100 properties in the Cincinnati area. Fifty-six of those are rented through a Housing and Urban Development voucher program, forty-eight of which are said to be occupied by residents “who appear to be black.” That fact alone should be sufficient to dispel any idea that Briskman has a problem renting to the more racially unfortunate among us.

But Dermisha Pickett was not going to go down without a stupid fight.

According to the feds:

On March 14, Pickett met with HUD agents and provided the agents with numerous discriminatory messages purportedly made by Pickett’s landlord. Pickett allegedly claimed to receive a call from the landlord as she arrived at the meeting with HUD OIG and placed the call on speaker phone. . . . Phone records and forensic analysis indicate that no text messages were exchanged during the time periods Pickett claimed. It is alleged that Pickett used mobile applications to fabricate text messages and phone numbers.

Yes, she was bullheadedly dumb enough to enter a federal office and fake a phone call from her landlord, savagely unaware that federal agents are able to trace such things.

Among the reputed text messages from Briskman that Pickett fabricated and trotted out to the press are:

I told you I’m not getting anything the inspection will fail because I’m not fixing anything or doing anything until you are gone but I told you I want you gone I will not rent African Americans again I don’t know why the previous landlord did sorry I hope you found your place so please stop texting me.

It’s nothing against you I will just rather put a white family in this unit You did nothing wrong I just don’t want a family of color here maybe you should try to go to a shelter.

I don’t really want to go into that conversation but I just don’t want want [sic] African Americans in this unit at this time

I will not rent [to] African Americans again. I don’t know why the previous landlord did

Briskman reportedly allowed federal agents to inspect his phone, and they concluded that he hadn’t sent any messages to Pickett during the time frame during which she claimed he bombarded her with the unacceptably discriminatory texts. Court documents allege that the messages she alleged were from Briskman originated from a Nokia phone that used applications designed to send fraudulent text messages.

Ms. Dermisha now faces up to 25 years in prison for “falsifying records in an investigation and making false statements to federal investigators in investigation over housing discrimination.” If convicted, this should give her ample time to figure out how to successfully frame white people for racial discrimination. We wish her well in her endeavors.

Smash-and-Grab Robberies of High-End Retailers Overwhelm Southern California

In a crumbling economy where the national debt can never be repaid, robots are taking our jobs, food prices are soaring, but fentanyl is cheap and easy to find, hordes of renegade entrepreneurs in Southern California are donning masks and forcibly availing themselves of luxury items for resale on the Dark Web.

So-called “smash-and-grab” robberies, in which groups of mischievous young ne’er-do-wells conspire to storm a local retail outlet, smash through its theft barriers, grab as much as they can carry, and hightail it out of there en route to dumping off their loot at shady warehouses that traffic in illicit items, are not unique to Southern California. It’s merely that what locals call the “Southland” has experienced a spate of high-profile incidents in the latter part of this summer:

• On July 31, a group of 10-15 suspects raided a Bloomingdale’s in Century City and made off with Gucci handbags and other items worth an estimated $100,000.
• On August 8 in Glendale, 30 to 40 people stormed the Yves Saint Laurent store and purloined $400,000 in luxury items.
• On Saturday, August 12, “nearly 50 thieves looted a Nordstrom at the Westfield Topanga mall in the West San Fernando Valley” and exited with an estimated $300,000 of merchandise.
• On Sunday, August 13 in East Los Angeles, “a trio of brazen thieves” ransacked a Nike store “in front of shocked shoppers” but, alas, were only able to steal about $1,000 worth of goods.
• On Tuesday, August 15, a group of 11 thieves barged their way into a Ksubi store on La Brea Avenue in Los Angeles and departed with about $100,000 of stolen booty.
• On Wednesday evening, August 16, another “Gucci Gang” stole an estimated $100,000 worth of handbags at a “temporary Gucci store in Costa Mesa’s South Coast Plaza.”

The Los Angeles Times instructs us that “we should be relieved, not disappointed” that police “did not arrive to confront the thieves” during any of these smash-and-grabs because at least that way, “there were no shootouts or hostages.”

As we all know, a thief’s life is far more valuable than any Gucci handbag.

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