The Spinal Solution: Satirizing & Subverting Goyim in Spinal TapTobias Langdon
When the Swiss mathematician Johann Bernoulli received an anonymous solution to a difficult problem he’d set in 1696, he saw at once who had sent it. The solver was Isaac Newton, he said, because he knew ex ungue leonem — “the lion by his claw.”
Toned, tanned, and overwhelmingly blond
That’s a wonderful phrase in both Latin and English: ex ungue leonem, the lion by his claw. In some small way, a great master reveals himself. But you can use the phrase ironically too, of course. Or you can say of some malign entity that you recognize “the snake by its hiss.” If you’re familiar with the Jewish culture of critique, the second phrase might be useful when you’re surveying the modern media. You often need only a glimpse of a film, television program, or news story to recognize Jewish hostility to goyim at work.
For example, the snake was certainly hissing in Rolling Stone’s searing exposé in 2014 of gang-rape at the University of Virginia (UVA). Knowledgeable goyim would have heard the snake loud and clear when they read of how “throngs of toned, tanned and overwhelmingly blond students fanned across a landscape of neoclassical brick buildings” at UVA. Sure enough, the exposé was a hate-hoax, and the writer, Sabrina Rubin Erdley, was a dark-haired, unattractive, and anti-gentile Jewess.
But I’ve been wondering whether the snake is also hissing in an apparently benign product of modern culture: the film Spinal Tap (1984). Full disclosure: I’ve always liked the film. It’s a funny piss-take of heavy metal and progressive rock using the fictional no-hopers Spinal Tap, which is “one of England’s loudest bands.” There seems to be affection in the mockery and the film has a happy ending. But what might someone familiar with the culture of critique make of it if he knew nothing about the actors? I think he might well hear the snake hiss and detect an anti-goy Jewish agenda. The first time I saw the film, I wasn’t Jew-wise and I heard no hiss. But I was and I did when I watched it again in 2011. And I’d now claim that it is at least in part a Jewish satire of goyim and their ludicrous ways. And that there’s also some typically Jewish promotion of sexual depravity.
After all, the film is produced and directed by Rob Reiner, who is Jewish, and two of its three main actors are Jews. Michael McKean, who plays the guitarist and lead singer David St. Hubbins, is apparently a full goy, but Christopher Guest, as lead guitarist Nigel Tufnel, and Harry Shearer, as bassist Derek Smalls, are both Jewish. Guest is sometimes said by reporters to be a difficult interviewee, which is further evidence of hostility, and Shearer is dark-haired, unattractive, and of below-average height. Does he perhaps share Sabrina Rubin Erdley’s distaste for toned, tanned blonds and their culture? Erdley dislikes “neoclassical brick buildings” and Shearer may dislike an earlier architectural expression of goyish genius: namely, Stonehenge.
If you’ve seen the film, you may have laughed right then. I certainly did as I typed the name “Stonehenge,” because Spinal Tap does an excellent job of making that neolithic masterpiece seem ludicrous. In the film (spoiler alert), the band wants an impressive stage-set and designs an imposing replica of Stonehenge. But the design is wrongly labeled in inches, not feet, and the replica Stonehenge is ridiculously small when it’s lowered onto the stage. Then a troupe of dwarves cavorts around it. The band complains that “there was a Stonehenge monument in danger of being crushed. . . by a dwarf.” The satire is in a particular context, of course, and it’s easy to argue that Spinal Tap is mocking not Stonehenge itself, but Black Sabbath’s failed attempt to exploit its grandeur. Nevertheless, the association is there: thanks to Spinal Tap, lots of goyim now laugh when they think of an astonishing and ancient goyish monument.
The power of art
I certainly have while writing this, but I have doubts now about whether I should. Humor can disenchant and diminish, and the neolithic masterpiece of Stonehenge is undeniably disenchanted and diminished in Spinal Tap. Literally diminished! And now I’m laughing again at memories of the film. That’s the power of art: it alters our minds and brains, reshapes our ideas and attitudes, even against our will. It can be good or bad that it has that power. When a hostile minority dominates art and entertainment, it’s bad. Jews have used art and entertainment as weapons against the goy majority for decades and even centuries. You might think I should lighten up about Spinal Tap and Stonehenge, but there’s evidence elsewhere about Jewish attitudes to that particular ancient gentile artifact.
The evidence is supplied by the Jewish comedian Sasha Baron Cohen, who has definitely pursued an anti-goy agenda in films like Ali G inna House (2002), Borat (2006), and Brüno (2009). Baron Cohen is very concerned about anti-semitism and “hate”: he delivered the keynote address at the ADL’s 2019 “Never Is Now Summit on Anti-Semitism and Hate,” where he was billed as “Recipient” of the ADL’s “International Leadership Award.” As John Derbyshire once pointed out, the protagonists of those three films are satires on three sets of anti-Semite: Pakistani Muslims, Slavic peasants, and Aryan Austrians (if the last group seems odd, remember that Hitler was Austrian).
The Ku Klux Klan used them as goalposts
But Baron Cohen has also created a much less famous goy-satirizing character, a beer-swilling, slag-shagging soccer-hooligan called Nobby from the town of Grimsby in northeast England (“nob” is British slang for “penis” or “fool”). This character appeared in an unsuccessful film called Grimsby (2016) in the UK and The Grimsby Brothers in the US. As part of publicity for the film, Baron Cohen was allowed to provide “Nobby’s Guide to the UK” in the Guardian. Nobby first described Stratford as “birthplace of Shakespeare” and added: “Think he was born where the car park bogs [lavatories] are now.” That’s not funny, but is an attempt to diminish a gentile genius. Shakespeare created the archetypal Jewish villain Shylock in his play The Merchant of Venice (c. 1596), as the highly educated Baron Cohen must be well-aware. Nobby then described Stonehenge as “a load of stupid stones, bloody miles from anywhere” and added: “I know, I know, they’re really important and old and all that blah blah blah — coz in the olden days the Ku Klux Klan used to use them as goalposts or whatever.”
That’s not funny either, but I hear a snake hissing. I’d suggest that Baron Cohen is revealing how goyophobic Jews view the depth and greatness of gentile history and prehistory in Europe. Stonehenge isn’t awe-inspiring or sublime to Baron Cohen: it’s alien and unsettling, a reminder of how long goyim have lived and labored here, and of how little Jews once mattered. Indeed, they once didn’t matter at all: there’s nothing remotely Jewish about Stonehenge. And I think that’s why Baron Cohen associates it with the Ku Klux Klan and why two Jewish actors literally dwarfed it in Spinal Tap. Baron Cohen also indulges the Jewish predilection for sexual depravity and bodily fluids in Grimsby. And in one scene Donald Trump is infected with AIDS. What a laugh, eh?
Goy-girls got ’em
But laughter is also used to promote sexual depravity in Spinal Tap, which may have struck an early blow in the campaign to normalize anal sex among heterosexuals. Here are the lyrics for Spinal Tap’s bass-heavy and innuendo-laden “Big Bottom”:
The bigger the cushion, the sweeter the pushin’:
That’s what I said!
The looser the waistband, the deeper the quicksand
Or so I have read.
My baby fits me like a flesh tuxedo:
I’d like to sink her with my pink torpedo.
Chorus: Big bottom, big bottom,
Talk about bum cakes, my girl’s got ’em!
Big bottom drive me out of my mind:
How could I leave this behind?
I met her on Monday, ’twas my lucky bun day
You know what I mean;
I love her each weekday, each velvety-cheek day:
You know what I mean.
My love gun’s loaded and she’s in my sights
Big game is waiting there inside her tights, yeah!
My baby fits me like a flesh tuxedo:
I’d like to sink her with my pink torpedo!
The lyrics are clever and the song is funny, but humor can be an excellent way to propagandize for things that would be resisted if they were first argued for openly and seriously. Spinal Tap is only joking about shiksas being buggered, y’know. C’mon! Lighten up! “Big Bottom” is just a bit of fun. Well, yes, it is fun, but I think that it’s more than that and that Jewish sexual subversion is at work. To understand how, here are some more clever lyrics, this time from a goy poet who understood how human psychology works:
Vice is a monster of so frightful mien,
As to be hated needs but to be seen;
Yet seen too oft, familiar with her face,
We first endure, then pity, then embrace.
That’s the Scottish poet Alexander Pope (1688-1744) in his “Essay on Man” (1734). Pope understood the concepts of desensitization and normalization. If you want to normalize a vice, one good way is to present it first in a humorous context. Anal sex is among many vices that were once seen as “frightful” in gentile societies but are now embraced, thanks in decisive part to Jewish subversion and the Jew-dominated pornography industry. Is “Big Bottom” part of that Jewish subversion? I think it very well could be.
The push to normalize pedophilia
Some observers of Jewish subversion also claim that Jews want gentile societies to embrace pedophilia — see, for example, Eric Striker’s “Authoritarians and Jews: the Push to Normalize Pedophilia” at the Unz Review and “2018 TEDx Talk: Pedophilia Is A Natural And Normal ‘Sexual Orientation’ You Must Accept” at Christians for Truth. With those claims in mind, have a look at the lyrics for Spinal Tap’s “Tonight I’m Gonna Rock You”:
Little girl, it’s a great big world,
But there’s only one of me.
You can’t touch cause I cost too much:
Chorus: But tonight I’m gonna rock ya,
(Tonight I’m gonna rock ya)
Yeah, tonight I’m gonna rock ya,
(Tonight I’m gonna rock ya)
You’re sweet but you’re just four feet
And you still got your baby teeth.
You’re too young and I’m too well hung:
You’re hot, you take all we got:
Not a dry seat in the house.
Next day, we’ll be on our way,
Little girl, it’s a great big world
But there’s only one of. . . Me!
Is that an attempt to normalize pedophilia? I think it very well could be. I’ve never found the song funny and I’m much more dubious now about the motives and psychology of its creators than I was in the innocent, un-Jew-wise days when I first saw Spinal Tap. It’s a fun movie, it’s a funny movie, but I suspect now that it’s part both of the Jewish culture of critique and of the Jewish campaign to subvert gentile society.
“Undermining the older American ethos”
If you want to know more about that campaign from the horse’s mouth, as it were, I can recommend an essay called “Jews — The Archetypal Multiculturalists,” by the late and (in my opinion) definitely great Jewish writer Larry Auster (1949-2013). Here’s an extract from the essay that applies strongly to what I’ve written above about Spinal Tap and its beguiling but possibly poisonous humor:
Up to the 1950s, school yearbooks and student newspapers were rather serious affairs, without the smiling photographs and self-mocking humor that began to appear in the late 1950s. Over the course of the 1960s and 1970s, this style of self-mockery and put-down, which had originally percolated into the general culture from Jewish comedians and entertainers, became a dominant feature in the general culture. The harm that was done to the culture, at least in the earlier stages of this process, was not deliberate. The Jews could indulge in in-your-face schtick without harming their culture because it was part of their culture. But its effect on WASPs was quietly devastating. The pop Freudianism of Jewish humor, in which each attitude of the self is immediately exposed as a cover-up for some craven or sexual impulse, has fatally weakened the Anglo-Protestant self, undermining virtues of modesty and self-control, respect for authority, and other values of the older American ethos.
Over and over, Jewish attitudes that had first appeared in mainstream entertainment in the form of harmless comic relief evolved into dominant cultural modes. In 1971, Woody Allen’s brilliant romantic comedy Play it Again Sam, with its insecure, fumbling protagonist, made it socially acceptable for a grown man to be a neurotic. Yet the movie was still basically affirmative, since Allen’s protagonist, despite his angst, nobly gives up the woman he loves, successfully imitating his screen hero Humphrey Bogart in Casablanca. The Jewish neurotic becomes a man by modeling himself after an Anglo-Saxon stoic. But by the 1980s, neurotic, hysterical men (who no longer emulate strong men but resent them) had become an accepted norm, not only in innumerable movies and TV shows, but in life. . . .
Up to the early 1960s, Jewish comedians pushed the envelope of bourgeois selfhood without trying to destroy it. They remained loyal to, if at the edges of, middle-class normalcy. But by the 1970s, the comic puncturing of the bourgeois had turned into a deliberate program of subversion. In such programs as MASH, the straight, up-tight, pro-authority characters served as contemptible foils for the irreverent, anti-authoritarian, sexually liberated protagonists. In several of television’s most successful sitcoms over the years, the main object of contempt has been a handsome, mentally defective WASP. What John Murray Cuddihy called the “ethnic-specific animus of Freud and Eastern European Jewry generally against Gentile civility” had moved from the esoteric world of the academic literary culture into the world of mass entertainment.
The film Spinal Tap is mass entertainment and I’d claim that Spinal Tap is satirizing and subverting goyim. The Jewish actor Christopher Guest re-casts the handsome English guitarist Jeck Beck (born 1944) as the “mentally defective” Nigel Tufnel, who uses D Minor, “the saddest of all keys,” for a song called “Lick My Love-Pump.” That’s funny, but also deflating, disenchanting, diminishing.
The same is true when the bassist Derek Smalls, as played by the Jewish actor Harry Shearer, is caught by airport security with a foil-wrapped cucumber in his trousers. I’m laughing again at memories of the scene, but that’s the power of art again. Jews often use humor to express their hostility towards goyim.
Spinal Tap is definitely funny, but now I realize I am only laughing at myself.
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