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The Worst Week Yet:
August 15-21, 2021

[1]2,263 words

Afghanistan: One Jew Left

As recently as 2005, there were two Jews left in Afghanistan. They both lived in the country’s last remaining synagogue, and they both actively hated one another.

One was named Yitzhak Levi, and he constantly bickered with his sworn nemesis, Zabulon Simantov, about which of them rightfully deserved to occupy the synagogue. In 1998, Levi snitched on Simantov, writing to the Taliban that his enemy had stolen Jewish relics. Simantov upped the ante by telling the Afghans that Levi operated a covert brothel where he sold alcohol. The Taliban dragged them both to jail, and later kicked them both out of jail, because their “constant bickering became too annoying [2].”

The two had met after Simantov had returned to Afghanistan from Israel, leaving his wife and two daughters there. In a 2002 profile in The New York Times, Simantov said of Levi, “I don’t talk to him, he’s the devil. A dog is better than him. . . . I don’t have many complaints about the Taliban, but I have a lot of complaints about him.” Levi retorted that Simantov was “a thief and a liar.”

Levi died in 2005, making Simantov the Last Jew Standing in the almost entirely Muslim country. He refuses to grant his wife a divorce and also refuses to move back to Israel, where he could be jailed for not letting his wife go her merry way.

Can someone in Hollywood please finance a movie based on Simantov and Levi’s story? Can Larry David write the script and direct?

When Priests Use Grindr

A pair of conservative Catholic bloggers [3] at a site called The Pillar recently published a three-part series wherein they did quite the journalistic deep-dive on mobile-device data, revealing that a priest who’d been assigned to oversee the Church’s sex-abuse scandals [4] had used his cell phone to meet men by repeatedly using the gay dating app Grindr “on a near-daily basis during parts of 2018, 2019, and 2020.”

They also did an exposé revealing that in the Newark archdiocese [5], “app signal data showed patterns of location-based hookup app use at more than 10 archdiocesan rectories and clerical residences during 2018, 2019, and 2020.”

The third article in their series demonstrated that:

. . . during a period of 26 weeks in 2018, at least 32 mobile devices emitted serially occurring hookup or dating app data signals from secured areas and buildings of the Vatican ordinarily inaccessible to tourists and pilgrims. . . . At least 16 mobile devices emitted signals from the hookup app Grindr on at least four days between March to October 2018 within the non-public areas of the Vatican City State, while 16 other devices showed use of other location-based hookup or dating apps, both heterosexual and homosexual, on four or more days in the same time period.

Maybe that whole “celibacy” thing was a bad idea, eh?

When self-professed “traditionalist Catholics” say the endless pedophilic sex-abuse scandals that have plagued the Church for at least a generation don’t represent “true Catholicism,” it reminds of me of Communists who say that the gulags and the Great Leap Forward don’t represent “true Communism.”

Who knows? Maybe Hitler didn’t represent “true racism,” either.

Shitting on Whiteness, cont.

By golly and by gum, a day can’t go by without one of our major institutions — whether corporations, schools, or the media — doesn’t feel compelled to drop its trousers, squat down, and take a big fat shit on the very idea of white people.

In the once snow-white state of Minnesota, a coalition of 162 principals and assistant principals [6] have signed a pledge to “de-center whiteness” in their schools because, as the Daily Mail explains, “minority students statistically perform worse than white students,” and the reason for that must certainly be white supremacy rather than the possibility that a lot of minority students are much dumber than white students.

Labeling themselves with the super-edgy moniker of “Good Trouble Principals [7],” their mission statement is a mishmash of the by-now predictably narcissistic, self-righteous, and anti-intellectual excuses for why many black students would rather play with rocks than solve algebra problems:

The undersigned principals declare publicly today that we are making some noise and getting in good trouble. Not for a day, a week, a month, or a year. But for a lifetime. And not because it is popular but because it is right. And not because we haven’t been engaged in good trouble before, but because we embrace the risk of being public with our declaration of getting in good trouble today. . . . We purposefully call out and lift up historically non-represented voices of color in our spaces to hold weight and power. . . . Speaking truth to power. Where our commitment to holding ourselves and those who serve under us accountable to this work is just as importantly extended to those who serve over us. . . . We declare that we are not leaving white children behind by lifting Black, Brown and Indigenous children up.

Rrrrrright. That must be why “white” is in lowercase and all the other groups’ names are capitalized.

Dr. Chanequa Walker-Barnes [8] is fat, black, angry, and ugly — and those are her good traits. I covered her earlier this year because she had a prayer published in a book that started with this charming line: “Dear God, Please help me to hate White people.”

Barnes recently gave a presentation about “pathological whiteness” that had her shrieking out like a wildebeest in heat:

America has a problem and its name is “whiteness.” . . . So, white people, how does it feel to be a problem? . . .  It’s as if there is an invisible force field connecting white people across space and time, directing their responses in ways that they cannot see. In family therapy we call that a system . . . It’s a pathological one . . . White people . . . act out even though it might pose a danger to [fat black ugly women such as myself]. . . . These symptoms are kind of the rules of white culture . . . The first symptom is conformity. . . . European immigrants to the US . . . had to take on the hallmarks of white middle-class propriety: avoiding conflict, valuing emotional restraint. . . . People conditioned into whiteness have been taught those who wield authority and power will use it in their best interest and those figures will be held accountable if they do not. . . . It is becoming more and more obvious that whiteness is a dysfunctional system . . . a pathology . . . it poses a threat to the fabric of our democracy if left unchecked . . . the good news, though, is that culture can be changed and pathology can be healed. The first step is naming the disease.

Okay, cool, I’ll name the disease: Its name is “Chanequa Walker-Barnes.”

Bank of America [9] is reputedly rolling out an indoctrination program for its employees which teaches that the United States is built on “white supremacy” and tells employees to become “woke at work.” The program tells white employees to “decolonize” their minds and “cede power to people of color.”

Earlier this year, some Bank of America outlets in North Carolina put their employees through a brainwashing boot camp called the “Racial Equity 21-day Challenge.” On the first day, employees were taught that America “use[s] race to establish and justify systems of power, privilege, disenfranchisement, and oppression . . . resulting in disadvantages to people of color.” They are lectured that all whites are “living a life with white skin privileges” and that white children as young as three “should be actively taught to recognize and reject the ‘smog’ of white privilege.”

Over three grueling weeks, employees were battered with tiresomely familiar terms such as “microaggressions,” “white fragility,” “racial trauma,” “environmental justice,” “the school-to-prison pipeline,” and “institutional racism.”

Maybe I’m wrong, but wouldn’t it be better to teach bank employees about, oh, banking? I haven’t read the training manual, but I’d bet my house that it doesn’t say a word about how the 2008 stock market crash was largely caused by the practice of giving home loans to mentally challenged and fiscally irresponsible minorities.

Just like the American Rescue Plan Act that was passed in March — which offered debt relief to black farmers and restaurateurs but not white ones — the infrastructure bill [10] that the Senate recently passed oozes with discrimination against whites. Henceforth, when contractors bid on solar or wind technologies, as well as proposals to improve urban traffic patterns, preference will be given to non-whites and women.

And as if white people weren’t already being bled dry by institutional discrimination, many foolish Caucasians are falling for a grift whereby they offer “reparations [11]” via sending money to black people in financial peril, a situation which seems to be en vogue for blacks.

Like many black activists, Chanelle Helm [12] is fat and unpleasant-looking. Back in 2017, she founded a group called Reparations Roundtable that is designed to tug at the tender heartstrings of white people when black people are in dire financial straits due to such calamities as unwanted pregnancies, criminal arrests, and simply being so unskilled and lazy that they wind up never making ends meet. Didi Williams, an organizer for a group called Reparations: Requests and Offerings, has noted that money starts pouring into their coffers whenever there’s a high-profile shooting of a black person: “Those types of surges happen when something terrible happens,” Williams said. “It’s like an outpouring of guilt.”

A lot of whites are pouring out torrents of guilt these days. But what happens when the well runs dry?

Nation of Axe-Wielding Maniacs

Two incidents came to light this week — one involving a black man hacking at a Hispanic man with a hatchet in New York, the other involving a multiracial coalition of homeless losers swinging wooden 2x4s and a machete at a white couple which one of them had just robbed in Seattle — which suggest that slasher movies will no longer be necessary, because America’s streets are becoming one unending slasher movie.

Surveillance footage [13] shows that at an ATM in lower Manhattan the Sunday before last, a black man who was wearing a mask — hey, it doesn’t only protect you from that virus, it hides your face from surveillance cameras! — crept up behind a 50-year-old Hispanic man and began mercilessly slashing at him with a hatchet. After beating and bloodying the man, the assailant used his hatchet to smash through three ATM screens before stupidly leaving the weapon and his backpack behind. The victim was taken to a hospital, and the assailant was taken to the world-renowned loony bin known as Bellevue.

In Seattle [14], a man who drove his car into a homeless man, dragging him 30 feet and killing him, will not be charged because video shows that he and his wife were being attacked by a motley crew of smelly freaks at a homeless encampment after they pulled up there seeking to retrieve some items that one of its denizens had stolen from them. During the attack, their two-week-old child was in the car as the baby’s father was being slugged in the head with a large slab of wood. As the couple made their escape, their car was pelted with rocks and had a window smashed in with a machete.

Two members of the homeless camp were arrested — one a 12-time felon and the other, who allegedly swung the machete, a relative underachiever with only nine felonies under his belt.

It’s Raining Them — and They are Fucking Nuts

Gender psychosis is but one of the multifarious mindfucks which the Powers That Be are foisting upon us in their ceaseless attempts to gaslight and unmoor our sense of reality, and one might be inclined to feel sorry for these deeply ill trannies if they didn’t insist on inserting themselves into every last remaining nook and cranny of our collective sanity.

There’s also a distinction to be made between being deeply mentally ill and being a superficial, whiny bitch, and Canela Lopez recently proved that a person can be both at once with an article she/he/it/shit wrote for insider.com called, “As a trans masculine person, my period doesn’t trigger feelings of anxiety — until I have to buy menstrual products labeled ‘for women’ [15]”:

I’m a trans masculine reporter who writes about sexual health. . . . My period has never made my [sic] feel gender dysphoria [16], but the way periods are framed as “only for women” triggers my anxiety. . . . I want more companies to stop gendering bodily functions and make trans-inclusive period products. . . . My period has never triggered feelings of gender dysphoria [16] as a trans masculine person, but the way people talk about menstruation and frame it as a “women’s issue [17]” makes me experience feelings of dread and discomfort. . . . Some days, I can ignore the honest mistake many PR representatives and companies make when trying to sell these products. Other days, I feel like I want to scream and curl up into a ball, in part due to my own dysphoria, but also because I know gendering periods makes it even harder for trans people to access adequate menstrual care.

Did it ever occur to this chick that her biggest problem isn’t that tampon manufacturers label women’s hygiene products as being for women, but that this chick thinks she’s a dude?

Nearly 40 years ago, that bald little Jewish musical director for David Letterman named Paul Shaffer scored a hit by writing the song “It’s Raining Men” for two fat black women who called themselves The Weather Girls. Now, Shaffer has given his approval for a “trans-inclusive remake [18]” called “It’s Raining Them.” The original couplet of “Tall, blond, dark and lean / Rough and tough and strong and mean” has been transitioned to “Cool, bold, strong and keen / Proud and loud and here and seen.”

Okay, two can play at this game:

Crazy, lazy, fat, and fucked-up
These sluts are nuts and need to shut up.

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